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Mother wishes to die

Started by Jay_2

11 Feb 2004, 12:29 AM

My mother is her 90's and living in a nursing home. Her medications are basically keeping her alive--she has enlarged heart, TIAs and depression and anxiety as well as senility. She does not want to be kept alive, but the staff do not wish to withdraw meds because 'she could have a massive stroke and be bedridden for many months' and they feel that she still has a good quality of life. It tears me apart to see her like this, and I would like to withdraw meds and let her go.

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Reply by Ogoopogo

11 Feb 2004, 4:13 AM

I hear your frustrations.. Does she have a DNR "legal government " one?? Ask her family Dr for the form or at least that is what we did here in B.C. with my 92 yr old MIL.
That being said & done all we can do is keep them comfortable & let nature or God take it's course.. I know my MIL has several times asked why she is still here & how much of a pain she is to everyone & all I can reply to her is guess it's NOT your time yet..

All I can gather is TIA's will happen more & more frequently.. heart will give out eventually too.. Wish I could off more advice..

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Reply by Jay_2

13 Feb 2004, 12:18 AM

Thanks for the reply. Yes, as her trustee, I have a DNA in place. Hopefully they will respect that, and not call an ambulance if she has a bad spell. I went to say her today, and the poor old dear is just lying there.

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Reply by angel baby_2

19 Oct 2006, 3:35 AM

Hi,Jay My daughter is considered pallative now she has severe cerebral palsey/scoliosis os getting worse and is putting pressure on her lungs now.She is only 14ys old,can't talk,walk and is tube fed and suctioned every 2 mins due to increase of secrections she cannot control.Watching her suffer is killing me.I am a single mom with a 4yr old son.The waiting and wondering how long it will be like this,maybe months?Maybe longer doctor's say.I have no support and live in cobourg ontario with very little support.I am hoping i will find it here...Heidi(mom of a very sick child)

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Reply by Digger

25 Mar 2013, 2:36 PM

Giving a loved one persmission to go is sometimes the best thing and the only thing we can do. This is about what your mother wants, not the staff, not the doctors or anyone else.

Dale

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