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I am so scared and worried 
Started by sickness
20 Oct 2013, 3:30 PM

My husband is nearing the end..I think?   .....
my husband has Colon cancer now liver mets and has been battling this with soo much strength in total for about 11 years.    He has been amazing, even the dr's who have written him off soo many times are amazed by his strength and determination to live!  
 BUT ... this past few weeks he has gone down hill sooo much!    He now uses a walker to get up and go to bathroom, his appetite is diminished, and he is slurring his words.   I am soo scared for him and my family to go thru this!    This morning he woke up I was talking to him and he was talking well slurring his words then just drifted out into space...I let him " think" then I called his name and he came back to me.   He is so determined to live... He is still receiving chemo every 2nd week!  I asked him if he was going on ?Monday and he said what's the alternative if I don't go?  If he goes ...I don't know how he will handle it...he's soo weak as it is??!!
 I don't know what to do?   we have home care but only during the week at lunch time for him and the palliative nurse comes Tuesdays.  
what's happening.. Is this normal?   What should I do?   I am sooo scared/worried? 
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Reply by marstin
21 Oct 2013, 4:27 AM

Hi sickness,

I can imagine how frightened you are right now. Has your husband had any change in his medication? I know changes in that can cause all kinds on strange side effects. You mentioned that he goes for chemo, is it this Monday that he goes? If it is then you might be able to talk to someone there who could check him out to see what's going on. I know it seemed to me that either the cancer or the treatment seemed to aggrevate other health issues so possibly that's what's happening.

Sometimes things can go very quickly in the world of cancer. My partner was one of those people that was doing quite well then it was like someone turned a switch and he became incapable of even getting out of bed and slept most of the time. I can remember the fear in our household when this began to happen and we had to gain strength through each other. I can feel your pain and wish that there was some way to bring you comfort. It is a terrible journey and it sounds like you have been battling this for so very long. Are you able to contact his doctor or the health care team before the nurse comes in on Tuesday? We used to have a doctor who came in once a week when Len became much sicker. Maybe they could send one out to check on him. If you become too frightened, please call an ambulance if you are near a hospital. They will be able to assess him there and give you the answers that you need. This is so much for you to try to deal with on your own.

You mentioned your family. How old are your children? Are they old enough to be of some support to you? Mine are in their early 20's and were able to step up to the plate and help with caring for their dad. It was not an easy time but it was a bonding time.

Know that you are in the hearts of many and we will be here when you need to share your load.


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