Hi Katie, this is eKim.
I am a contributor to this site simply because I love to encourage and comfort people. I have daughters about your age, Katie and I am reaching out to you as I would to them.
Are you receiving help from medical care workers that visit your Mom at home? This is a good alternative to explore if you haven’t done so.
Another alternative (if you are willing and able, and when the time is right), is a residential hospice. The care offered is outstanding, more than can be offered 24/7 by even the most devoted family. I have volunteered at our local hospice for four years now, and I know, first hand, that it is an excellent alternative. I would chose it for myself.
I must tell you that I cannot “put myself in your shoes” simply because I have not experienced what you are experiencing. Nonetheless, I would like to reach out to you with something that helps me greatly to deal with the stress of hospice volunteer work.
I use a "Floating" analogy for my stress management program.
I picture myself floating in a warm, gentle stream.
Suddenly I see "trash" (negative thoughts, events, situations etc.) floating towards me.
Two things are unhealthy a) ignoring/denying them and b) overreacting to them.
So what to do? I simply observe the thought/mood/event/situation. I observe it until it floats by and then I fall back into my gentle, warm, environment.
It is important that you know what is your own “gentle, warm environment”. For me it is simply the love that I share with my family – that is all I need to see me through ANY difficult times.
If you ever master this technique, it can be of great comfort, I believe - eKim
“Life isn’t meant to be easy. It is meant to be lived. Sometimes good, sometimes rough. But with every up and down, you learn lessons that make you strong. Learning is a gift, even when pain is the teacher.” - unknown