Hi Katherine

I'm finding its very hard to get thru each day & the house is very empty & quiet. Its not too bad thru the day but the evenings are the worst when you have no one to talk with. And very lonely. I was away with friends for about 12 days & it was so nice to be around people but I still had to come home & face reality. Some days are better than others. This coming weekend my daughter & I are going to be volunteering for the Cancer Society for their Pull For Hope. I'd like to try doing some volunteering but I don't like asking/selling to raise funds & I found out at the Mudmoiselle 5K run/obstacles we volunteered for that I don't do well standing out in the hot sun for long. So I'm not sure what to look into. I know I'm inpatient for the time when my heart won't hurt so much. I know it takes time. Its two months today that my husband passed on. I miss him so much.

Thanks for thinking of me. All thoughts are welcome.

Dorothy

Hi,
It feels as though you have been reading my mail Dorothy... My husband died 4 months ago and like you I have found the house quiet and empty - amazing how one person can make so much 'noise' in our lives. And like you, I am impatient for the time when it own't hurt so much. But still I want to feel what I feel - does that make sense? For me, it's finding the balance between being busy and having quiet. This last week seems to have been a bit too busy. 

Have you found a place where you can comfortably volunteer? I am hoping to look more in the new year. My husband always enjoyed Christmas so much - I think childhood in Newfoundland started that:) but for me January 2 was always my happier place. 

A member, Kirstie started Feel like I am losing my mind  this morning. Her husband died in October. Could I ask those of you on this thread to consider responding to her?

Take care all

HI Katherine  So sorry for your loss. So you know how hard it is to get thru the days.  My husband Lynn so enjoyed Christmas. I was always the one who didn't like putting up the tree so he did it. I have put up a tree this year, my daughter pushed me to put one up. So it's there for him.. Each day is getting harder to get thru as Christmas gets closer. I'm trying to stay busy but it seems I have a real busy day then the next day I'm wiped out. As I get older it seems to take longer to do the everyday chores. I was always kept so busy looking after Lynn over a period of abt 16 mos & for about 6 mos before that I was diagnosed with breast cancer so I was in treatment at the same time as he was so now my days seem so empty & can't get going some days. I feel very lost at times. By the way my mammogram in Sept was clear so I'm a survivor for now anyway.

Haven't found any volunteer position that I might be interested in. I just don't know what I'd like to do. Everything seems to take so much effort.

Katharine thank you for your kind words. And wish you a Happy Christmas. But I know it won't be the same without our loved ones but I try to believe that he's sitting on my shoulder watching over me. And I do talk to him sometimes. Last night I found a sm feather on my bedroom floor. They say if you find a feather it means that your loved is nearby or thinking of you. It doesn't matter if this is true or not it just gives you something to think about. And I don't have anything in the house that has feathers in it. I'm allergic to them.

Well I'll wish everyone a Happy Christmas.

Hope for the best in the new year.

dorms

Hello 
Dorms I am wondering how the first few months of 2016 have been for you. I had not heard about the feather. You are absolutely right - I think - it doesn't matter if it is true or not - and what is truth really - I imagine it gave you some comfort. 

Ames, another member talked about the comfort of owls in this post how do I move forward without her. how do I get the images out of my head?.after her sister died. 

Take care dorms. Sending thoughts of comfort to you across the miles.

Katherine

Hello Katharine  Thanks for your message. Winter was late in arriving but it can leave anytime. I'm tired of the snow & cold. I still feel so lost, can't seem to find my way some days. I've joined a yoga class for seniors called Stand Up. It gets me out of the house two afternoons a week. I've decided I'd like to stay in my home as long as I can & as long as I can find a good handyman that I can depend on if I need one. Thats the big worry for me as my husband always did the fixing of things. But where I go from here I just don't know. I'm just doing one day at a time. I read the messages from Xenia & admire her for her strength & purpose she shows in her writings.

Take care

   Dorms