Dear Saara,
Thank you for hearing what was said. I lived through a terrible experience, floundering and questioning. Searching for help, searching for someone in a similar situation. I was depressed, angry, fearful and lost. Tired beyond reasoning, and then tired of hearing of my “great” loss. I feel no quilt or shame with my thoughts and feelings. I gave of myself, I loved and I respected. Who could ask for more?
As I lay in bed last night, I questioned who truly understands denial in a loved one and the hurt it can create, but those who have been through it. Why is it not spoken of clearly? Are we ashamed of our thoughts? Are we afraid to be judged?
It’s hard to think clearly when you’re in the situation, moving from moment to moment, experiencing every nuance of the journey. I feel for those who come behind me, hoping to ease their passage through this terrible experience.
Cherel