Dear shell92108,
thank you you for joining the forum. Thank you for sharing a bit about you, your family, your diagnosis.
you didn't mention if you have any children. If you do, do they live near you?
sounds like most of your family is spread out across the country, and into canada - it seems that today that is the case, we all kind of live independently, and far from each other.
the gift of the Forum is that we can be miles apart in actual distance, but through the magic of technology, you and I can share thoughts and offer a listening ear, encouragement, and sometimes I may even come up with a good idea! ( that's my funny side coming out)
there is nothing funny about the reality of our stories of sickness, loss and isolation.
you will find a circle of support here where different people with different skills will reply to you and offer help, and friendship.
You are younger than I, I am mid 60's. i want to encourage you to keep writing, ask questions, (there are professionals on this website) also knowledgeable writers on this forum.
i think that surrounding yourself with good friends, your husband, leaning on the support, talking to us (strangers) when you really want to vent, cry, let things out. All those things help.
we all want every day to count, none of us know what awaits us today, next week, next year.
for me, keeping busy with things I love, crafts, friends, music, movies, that kind of thing - helps me to keep focussed on today, make a small plan for tomorrow, little steps, not trying to plan far ahead.
what I am trying to say is, live in each moment, there will be good days and I am sure bad. You aren't going to be alone. Real life and VIrtual Hospice forum members will keep you feeling connected and become a sort of routine, part of each day when you can check in, say how your day is going, etc.
for now, I just want to say you aren't alone, and you can type messages any hour of the day, so feel the friendship and support.
you will be in my thoughts today,
I will be watching for your notes;)
sending you a cyber hug - not the same as the real thing, but still sent with energy that is real.
sincerely,
NatR ;)