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Reply by KathCull_admin
04 Feb 2014, 4:03 PM

Hi Sue
How are you? I am missing your 'rantings':) Everything okay?
Katherine 
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Reply by Sue B
05 Feb 2014, 8:25 AM

Hi Katherine.
I have another exacerbation going on. I'm improving but I am heartily sick of being sick. 
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Reply by KathCull_admin
12 Feb 2014, 10:07 PM

Hi Sue
Was just thinking about you so thought I would drop you a line:) It's cold here - very cold with that old Windchill that did not exist when I was a kid! But the days are longer - funny how as I get older I appreciate the things my mother used to say.  Last week I bought a crocus plant - with just the green shoots. How wonderful was it when the flowers opened - that beautiful purple colour - what plants do for my soul.  

I know that you had an exacerbtion last time we chatted - don't want you to feel you need to respond - I just wanted to let you know I think about you often. Just don't want to fill your inbox:)

Take care
Katherine 
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Reply by Sue B
18 Feb 2014, 12:43 AM

I have been trying to contact you for a couple of days to tell you i was in icu in Chilliwa k. Give me a couple days and I'll try to fill you in. The nutshell verzion is my bloddgas ph went critically low. This has changed me forever
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Reply by KathCull_admin
18 Feb 2014, 12:51 AM

I have been a little worried that you were in hospital Sue. Look forward to hearing from you as you are able. Thanks so much for the note.
Katherine 
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Reply by moderator | modératrice
18 Feb 2014, 1:14 AM

Dear Sue,

Thank you for taking the time to drop us a note. Take care of yourself. We look forward to hearing from you when you are able to. 

I guess I just said the same thing as Katherine in reverse order.
Thinking of you.
Colleen 
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Reply by Sue B
25 Feb 2014, 2:54 PM

Good morning all.
I think I finally have enough information (possibly) to roughly explain what happened...I think.
On February 12th, I had a serious gas trapping event, which resulted in my blood Ph level becoming critically low. I was intubated and, since I could not stop thrashing, they placed me in a coma. I hear though that that didn't stop me from thrashig (sort of freaky) and they had to restrain me. I was unconsous and have no memory of this. The last thing I remember is trying to get out to the ambulance. Then black.
My first clear memory after that is having the twin tubes removed in ICU, and being put on a C-pap mask. That was scarey, but as you can tell I'm still here. I think that that was on Saturday the 15th (?). As an aside, those beds in ICU are so insanely comfortable; they have air-bags and sensors so if you get even one preasure spot a balloon pumps up and suddenly you're all okay again. Also, being on c-pap for an extended period of time gives you the all-time worst case of mung-mouth. God bless my staff who regularly swabbed out my mouth for me!
At some point I was moved up to a medical ward, and that as they say is that. It's Tuesday the 25th and I've been home for four days.
Life Changing Event - that's how I would define it. My head is still realing. And like the fool I am, yesterday afternoon I broke down and had a smoke. Yup. It's time to get some help with this. Clearly I can't do it alone.
And we are now more or less up to date in the story of Sue. Plus you have gotten to hear me go on & on & on about something.
Have a really great week!
Sue 
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Reply by KathCull_admin
25 Feb 2014, 3:41 PM

Hi Sue
I am so glad you are now able to 'go on & on'! I have missed you.

How frightening for you and your family. Everything happening so quickly with very little if any ability to control it. It's good to know that others were looking after you and your needs - with the bed, medication, your mouth, and caring for your family. Can you say more about 'Life Changing Event'? I just wondered what you were thinking about when you wrote that... 

And more life changing to come - quitting smoking. You might feel foolish having a smoke but it makes sense - I imagine it gives you some comfort. I used to smoke the odd cigarette but for some reason (not because at 18 I was particularly wise) never took it up regularly.

Who do you look to for help with stopping smoking? The support group you go to? Your doctor or healthcare providers? Can I help?
Katherine


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Reply by Sue B
25 Feb 2014, 5:02 PM

Yes we were all pretty terrified. The ICU staff does so much more than make sure your (in my case numerous) IV's are in good order and such like. If nothing else they are simply there for family to call.
Life changing event...how do I define it? And I have been trying to for a few days.Things are more immediate. I feel things and spirits and stuff in general more. It's just all so much more in-my-face. I'm not so depressed anymore. Clinical depression has been a major problem with me my whole life; and now it just ... isn't. Things are brighter and more interesting, but on the other hand I've realized how serious my anxiety is. The good part of that is we can now begin to manage it.
I don't have a group or anything for stopping smoking yet. However the home air assessment person is coming this morning -icy roads permitting- and I bet she'll have some good information on that. So it's all a new journey...'Guess the Dali Lama was right; it's isn't about the destination. 
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Reply by KathCull_admin
28 Feb 2014, 4:59 AM

I’ve started this response to you at least 5 times Sue – and then when I got it the way I wanted, I lost the whole thing!  

I don’t want you to think that I am saying, “I know what you mean,” because I don’t – your experience is not mine , but it sounds as though you have faced ‘the worst’ and it no longer has a hold on you. Your words express freedom to me.  I know you will tell me if I am off the mark


I am sending good thoughts your way – to aid in smoking cessation. It sounds like you have made up your mind which always seems to be a good step when I want to change an action.


It’s about the road isn’t it Sue? “I’m just a pilgrim on the road boy,” with acknowledgement to Steve Earl.
Good night
Katherine 

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