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Reply by NatR
27 Dec 2015, 3:58 PM

Dear linda,

welcome to the forum.  I see you are already sharing your feelings with members and I wanted to add my note 

first of all,  I am sorry about your diagnosis.  But as it was touched on in the previous thread - sometimes knowing we are dealing with serious health issues makes us take more pleasure in each day...and max out the good days doing precisely what matters to you.

i am in my mid 60s, and almost a year ago I lost a cousin my age.  The sad thing about her illness was that everyone around her thought she was going to get better, and I knew she wouldn't.  Right up til the last couple of weeks everyone was in denial and I don't think they really got it.  I think that was a tragic thing for my cousin...and we all need to make every day our best day. 

i am glad you know.  I would want to know...and spend each day doing what matters.
i hope this isn't sounding negative or hard....but I do wish that we all would be surrounded by support and quality of life til our very last day.  And for all of us, life is tenuous and accidents take away that time that becomes so very valuable.

here on the forum I hope you feel the warmth and concern that will surround you as you write us.
do reach out to us, to your family near you.
best wishes from me in my snowy corner to you in yours (if you have snow)
do what matters to you...
best wishes,
NatR  💓😉🌟🌲
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Reply by linda*
27 Dec 2015, 10:14 PM

thanks for another kind response.

I went exploring; I explored some of the forums here.
some people have it really hard for a really long time.
I'm embarrassed that I was feeling sorry for myself when I have it so good.

(that would be a sigh of resignation)

(breathing out a bit of sadness)
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Reply by MelissaAnn
31 Dec 2015, 11:21 PM

I  wish you the best 
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Reply by NatR
01 Jan 2016, 12:01 AM

Hello Linda and Melissa Ann,

we each carry  our own load and you can't really compare one to another,
dont apologise for feeling you aren't as entitled to support as someone else.  Each of us feel overwhelmed by much or little / and it's not comparable to other situations

I would say that patients and their caregivers feel this way a lot - and they deny needing support or comfort -just because they feel guilty to say it
dont feel guilty ever
Glad you are sharing with others and hearing others as well.
thats what makes this message board such a nice place to be - and it is such a boost to those who need a kind word
best wishes tonight on this last night of 2015
sending my thoughts
NatR ⛄️🎄🎉🎊 
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Reply by KathCull_admin
01 Jan 2016, 12:55 AM

Hello everyone, 
Welcome MelissaAnn – I am glad you posted.  It's not always easy to put those first few words down. As I mentioned to Linda* the number of people living with serious illness is small on our discussion forum but I think it could be helpful to 'talk' with others in similar (but always unique) circumstances. As well, this discussion forum is a safe place to talk about your experiences and feelings.

Linda* I have not - to this point- had health problems but my husband did and reading your posts I was reminded of him (thank you :) and how like you he didn't complain but stated facts and said how he was feeling.  I think that it is important for people to be able to ‘tell it like it is’ and I think you will find that in this community we are virtual friends who want to understand and will support.

NatR thank you as always for your warm words and thoughts.

At this often celebratory time of year – I wish you all peace and the support of those who love and care for you.



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Reply by Carlyn
07 Jan 2016, 12:51 AM

Popping in to say hello to everyone.  It's good to see you MelissaAnn; welcome to the forum. 

Linda* I wish I'd said earlier, I live with illness. Sharing that only so you know you have company. My illness is classified the same as cancer but it isn't yet. It may or may not end up that way. I've had this diagnosis since 2002 so have gotten used to sticking to facts of it etc. 

Anyhow, wonderful words of welcome and wisdom from everyone and such kindness. I have some things to process here but I have thought daily of those who have shared their story and support for each other. Checking in and keeping you all in mind with good thoughts. 

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Reply by linda*
07 Jan 2016, 1:28 PM

for me, living with serious illness,  sometimes it is hard to stay positive.  

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Reply by Carlyn
07 Jan 2016, 3:02 PM


That seems completely normal to me.

I think being positive works in some circumstances and not in others. 

This may be inappropriate to ask, and I apologize if so, but this helps some so I wondered if you are doing anything creative?

Or is there something else you're doing to sort of prepare or just settle things you care about?

I'm wondering how your days are going and if any of your friends know yet.

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Reply by linda*
07 Jan 2016, 4:07 PM

hi carlyn.
I suppose it is normal.  thanks for the reminder.  

I am a musician, a classically trained pianist.   music is therapeutic solace for me.

I gave my piano away because I know it would be a big head ache for my kids to find a home for it later.  I really miss it.   I have a keyboard but it's not the same.   and since christmas I've been learning to play accordion.  short sigh.  I think it's important to exercise the brain.

thanks again for the reminder.
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Reply by Carlyn
07 Jan 2016, 4:18 PM

Hi Linda*,

My heart fell reading you parted with your piano to spare your kids. It gave me some sense of how irritated my brother gets with me when I do things to spare him at cost to my own enjoyment. I completely get it though.

Ok my brother in law is also a pianist by weird chance. Not for a living though so when he travels for work, he contacts a local university if they have a music department. They always let him go in and play alone so he can enjoy playing while away from home.

I mention this because I agree on keeping the brain busy, and although the accordion is lovely, if you have the option of an uni close by ...one with a music dept... might be worth considering calling them up to see if you can use their piano once a day for an hour or two? Will leave it with you to think on.

Other option is renting one maybe... ?

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