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Reply by NatR
23 Apr 2016, 2:37 PM

So glad the visit went well 
thats important to feel at peace and that you are feeling good about everything
sending you sunshine from my corner of Canada
and a huge cyber hug 🌷🌻🙅 
NatR 
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Reply by Carlyn
30 Apr 2016, 12:44 AM

Hello Linda*, Wingman, Nat, Katherine, 

Hope I've not missed anyone.

Linda, more than a few times, your turn of phrase has made me smile or laugh out loud for real. I was happy to see your son visited and you feel good about it all. 

We're at the end of April now so I just wanted to check in finally and say hello to all of you. I've thought of you many times. Haven't done my taxes yet. Papers are in a box and that's on agenda for tomorrow. Fun times ahead!

Carlyn 
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Reply by linda*
12 May 2016, 5:28 PM

thursday, may 12th, 2016.

cold.  wet.  windy. 

birds are sheltering somewhere else.

all the blossoms have closed themselves up.

my neighbour mowed the long green grass down to the brown.

 

grumble grumble.

 

I am struggling to make myself eat when I don't really want to.

I can see that it would be easy to just quit eating.

sigh.

 

ok. a wee finch came to the feeder by the window.
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Reply by NatR
12 May 2016, 5:42 PM

Hello Linda,

yes its it's hard to find inspiration to  keep moving to keep eating to keep living - but hold onto the thought that despite the cool wet weather there is one brave bird looking to keep its energy up:)
thats you too!

its good to get your note - the forum works best when there is interaction;)
i hope you can feel energy from the writers who don't know you personally but we all can identify with your feelings and try to understand

sending you thoughts and best wishes
write again and fill us in on your feathered visitors - 
 Sincerely 
natR 🌷 
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Reply by linda*
13 May 2016, 6:57 PM

natR, wingman woman, carlyn, Katherine,
 

you've all helped with the process of keeping positive.

thanks.
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Reply by KathCull_admin
14 May 2016, 6:23 PM

Hello everyone,
I know my age is showing - when I read that your neighbour mowed the grass my first thought was, "Zeke mowed the grass. The long green grass." Dear old Zeke - I wonder what ever happened to him, Spot, Dick and Jane.... I am programmed to keep the grass cut a little longer - if that makes sense. I am thinking you don't like the brown roots showing either linda*

Do you prepare your meals or get some help with that? Would there be someone or someway you could eat with someone if you don't already from time to time?

I don't think I have mentioned that I went to a couple of 'birding and breakfast' sessions.  I know what a few birds look like but it was fascinating for me to know that I had seen over 30 species of birds and ducks in an hour. My husband used to like birds - so I have taken up that interest in a small way.

Hope the sun shines and the birds sing in your corner of the world this week.
Take care
Katherine 
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Reply by linda*
15 May 2016, 5:34 PM

hi katherine.  every day, good or bad, I eat an apple. 

so far, I prepare my own food and mostly eat alone but I'm trying to be deliberate about changing that. 

while I now know it would be pretty easy to just quit eating,  I'm not ready for that.

these past few months, on good days I prepared & froze small quantities of nutritious stuff I like to eat and on bad days, all I had to do was get to the fridge.  it's helped.   bad days I drink some sort of dietary supplement.  

and I have a recipe card of comfort foods...

since I am noticing such a BIG difference between good days and bad days,  I've started asking for help with the preparation of the stash.  I think I might even be ok with getting someone to shop for me if need be.

I've shared my condition with a couple of friendly cooks. 

 

so far, I figure the good days out-number the bad, eight to two. 

 

about those birds - I watched my young cat, louis the great, take a flying leap, knock the birdseed bell out of the tree and my old red golden retreiver, buddy, grabbed it and ran. poor birds. my newest discovery is a young garter snake who has taken up residence under the drain spout.  growth there is quite lush.  he suns on the door step.

sun's shining today.
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Reply by Carlyn
17 May 2016, 5:04 AM

Linda... a snake on the door step? Is there anyone who could maybe make the snake disappear - in a permanent way? lol Seriously though.... on the front step .... you are very brave. 

Your pets sound comical despite their interference of bird feeders... :-)  I am sorry about the birds though. I hope they still come around often. Now that it's spring maybe there are lots of things in the yard in nature they'll be happy to come and investigate.

Your approach to food is mighty impressive. I'm no expert on these matters but i'm impressed by how proactive and dedicated you are to keeping good nutrition and planning ahead. Friendly cooks are good. I hope they make you some delicious dishes soon!

A wee distraction to share, though not as exciting as the personal zoo you have going on (which is kind of awesome) - there's a retirement condo building across the way from mine. Lot of elderly people so it's quiet, beautiful new building too.

They've done some lovely ground work. I can see it from my condo. It's nice to look out and see a big pond a a park with benches and lawn. 2 geese have claimed the pond as their home turf and chased off a random goose who tried to visit I guess. There is 1 mallard duck they allow to hang occasionally with them. And the pond has koi fish! I coudn't see that with my blurred vision but a friend stopped in and she looked down and said "and look, you have koi"... I had no idea until she said so. So it's good here. No dogs, cats or snakes but the geese are pretty determined pond owners and that's kind of entertaining here :-)

I meant to say also the energy drinks are a great alternative on days when cooking or any food prep doesn't appeal. Good idea having those on hand.

Carlyn

 
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Reply by linda*
21 May 2016, 10:08 PM

wingman:

I was visiting the virtual hospice and came across 'what the doctor didn't say'.

I know you've made previous reference to the friend.   how goes it?

 

carlyn.  your new digs suit you.

 

K. I envy you your choir.

 

the community where I live (pop. 800+)  has a hospital but resulting from a decade or so of improvements to the provincial health-care system, the hospital has mostly become a place where people are assessed and then moved on to a bigger centre.   no babies born, no tonsils out.  there used to be 5 full time doctors, now there are 2 1/2.  people can go to the hospital for chemo and there is a hospice suite.  it is a teaching hospital.

 

there is a struggle to entice doctors to set up practice in the country. 

the way it is now, we are notified each month of the weekends when there will  be no emergency services.  more  paperwork's been done and now, if need be I can be admitted to the hospital even if there's no doctor.  I really don't plan to go to the hospital but people are committed to filling out those forms.  and maybe it will come in handy, who knows. 


the problem with filling out forms is after they're filled out they need to go the right place and I think some of those people don't get that part of it.



next week, the palliative care co-ordinator for the area health authority,  who retires next month, is stopping by with a couple of student nurses for some rousing conversation. 

once I get the words out of my mouth, that I'm getting ready die, I'm good to talk about it.                                                                                     

 
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Reply by Carlyn
21 May 2016, 11:16 PM

Linda, I'll be thinking of you this week. Sending a (hug).

Katherine, I'm sorry for not saying hello last time I posted.  
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