Dear CarrieK,
The above notes say all that I wanted to say as well....Cath1 and Tian, and all of us here wish we could enfold you in a giant group hug and at least let you know you are not alone.
I send you my condolences and echo the message that Cath1 said...we are here...we will be here...there will be someone to respond to your notes, whether its late at night or early in the morning...Support is what you will need...and I hope you will search out a group in your community.
Sometimes it helps to find others who are going through the same circumstance, sometimes it doesnt. Everyone grives in their own way, in their own time. Everyone still feels the pain.
For your children this loss is hitting them, but not nearly as hard as it hits you. You were the other half of the couple that you formed. You were an identity with your husband and now you may feel that suddenly you are standing alone - and who are you and how will you go on?
As Cath1 said...there are many things we might say that help, and there are times that things we say do not apply at all. But we all are trying to say something that fits you:)
So forgive me if anything in my letter doesnt apply at all to you...just skim through it, and disregard the rest:)
Today...I am hoping that someone will cross your path, other than here in the forum, someone who can hear your pain, comfort you just a bit. I wonder if also you are back to work too quickly? or if you need to be there thats okay too..but sometimes its really hard to go back to what everyone considers...the "normal routine" is very hard to do.
Whatever your next few weeks, whatever you do, please know that we are here to unload to, to share your feelings...and just to hear you....
One final thought came to mind...life is full of change...whether we want it or not, whether we are prepared or not. Sometimes it takes a lot to adjust, as in the case of your so very beloved husband, and other things are easier to cope with.
So...take your time and let things settle for you...and I know...that you are strong, and that you will get through this valley. Hang in there...please keep in touch.
my sincerest thoughts to you today,
NatR