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Quote – Drawing strength from pain. 
Started by eKIM
24 Apr 2014, 4:15 PM

“Try to look at the painful moments in life as giving you strength rather than taking it from you.  Feel the pain, and then release it.  Learn from it, and then move on from it.  Don’t continue to dwell on it or carry it around with you, or you will never fully heal from it.  Pain is part of life and the challenge is to break through it.”  - unknown

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Reply by eKIM
24 Apr 2014, 4:23 PM

This quote does a 180 degree turn on the typical reaction towards painful events in our lives.  Allowing the pain to make us stronger rather than weaker.

But how could one accomplish this.  Can anyone share some thoughts on this?

At times in my life I have felt diminished during painful events.  I have felt weak and did not know where I could find the strength to carry on.  I did not know how to release my pain.  Time (and lots of it) was the only healer.

Yet I have observed people who somehow rise above their own pain and find strength in reaching out to others.

They selflessly comfort others, even though their own suffering is still raw.  Although I admire people who can do this, I don’t know if I could be so strong.  

At some point in everyone’s life we will experience painful times.  It is possible to prepare oneself ahead of time handle these times better?  Or is it only by going through a devastating experience that we can learn our own path through pain?

Please share your thoughts so that we all may learn.  ~ eKim


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Reply by Brayden
26 Apr 2014, 6:23 PM

Dear eKim,
It could take writing a book to answer your question but I just have a comment or two. From my volunteer experiences I firmly believe that you deal with pain the way that you have prepared your life before it happens. If you live your life in a manner where you are quick to judge, quick to anger, lack forgiveness etc., you will have a real problem dealing with your own pain. Just last week I witnessed two companions that died and they blessed me with a perfect picture of death. They were so at peace with themselves and their relationships with everyone in the room. The soft music and love in the room expelled all fear and anxiety. I also have found that if you cannot learn to forgive, you really compound the problem for yourself. Your post does not have an easy answer.
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Reply by eKIM
27 Apr 2014, 2:06 AM

Hi Brayden

I read with interest, your comment, “If you live your life in a manner where you are quick to judge, quick to anger, lack forgiveness etc., you will have a real problem dealing with your own pain.“

If I understand you correctly, it is as if you surrounded yourself with “negative energy” all your life, it will rise up and bite you really hard when you are in a vulnerable situation, i.e. a painful experience.

It must follow then, that if you are non-judgemental, peaceful, you forgive because (among other things), it is good for your own peace of mind and soul, then you will surround yourself in a “positive aura”.  Then when you have a painful experience you will be in a better position to deal with your pain.

I might add that if you spend a lifetime reaching out with loving-kindness to comfort those in pain, you should not be surprised that when it is your turn to hurt, that kind, loving “others” will help you through your pain.

Some people call this Karma.  Some people simply call it common sense.

-        eKim

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