Ahhh April 01, I am so sorry to hear of your huge loss, your soul mate :( Yes it is the most difficult time especially when you loved each other so very much!!! A suggestion - writing him a letter. might help with the emotions the feelings, just a suggestion, I did that with my mom, wrote to her like she was still here, I never read them again., I put all my heart felt emotions in them but to nevr read them again but burned them and while burning them in back yard in a steel pail I was thinking the smoke from all that heart felt emotions was going up to creator & to her - made me feel a bit better...just a suggestion only.
I am sending you love and light & a huge huge hug Apirl 01!!! I so do hope you do keep coming and sharing with us - if this helps at all. Please know I do not say this to upset you but the love you two share does not go anywhere for he still loves you as much from the other side, love knows no boundaries. My mom shared that with me in a dream - pay attention to your dreams too - k.
Not now but when you feel like you are able too I do think a group in your area that is a good thing., we have one in the next city it's called an after life group., people from all walks of life who have lost a loved one, some a month or two, others 1, 2 or 3 years. It is a coming together, only when you fell ready to do so though.
Take care of your precious self and try and rest & eat - I know that must be hard to do too at this time. hugs We are here for you too