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Réponse de CdnAtHeart
09 janv. 2017, 16 h 17

Hello to all:

Still on the ride!  Just when I thought we'd all come to an agreement and had a plan to move foreward things fall apart.  Suddenly we have issues we've never had before with my mom's care agency; poor communication, failure to return voice or email enquiries, making decisions then reversing them.  I belive this is due to a new Administrator and a new Case Manager (who is very inexperienced). 

And my mom, who told me she had made the decisison to enter into long term care, tells me yesterday that "they" are "forcing" her out of her home and "making" her go into long term care and that she has no choice.  No one is making her do anything.  What I believe is happening is that she is, understandably, frightened by having to make this big decission.  She has been someone who has never taken responsibility for her choice or actions her entire life - always the victim, always waiting for others to do things for her, then blaming them when she's unhappy with the results.  

I am heading there for a two week visit for the last week of January, first week of February.  I plan to get in touch with her Doctor and ask for a meeting with her, the other significant memebers of my mom's care team, and myself and my mom so that we can discuss my mother's fears and concerns and try to address them as best we can.  Just as we did back in November.  What's the definition of insanity - doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results?  

It all feel rather fuitle as I'm afraid that, no matter how much effort I put into sorting out this latest turn of events, it will all go to hell the minute I leave anyway.  Again.  And my mother will deny ever having made the plan we all agreed to, ever having had the conversation, ever having agreed to anything.   But I'm at a loss as to what to do differently.  Any ideas, anyone?

CdnAtHeart 
 
Réponse de KathCull_admin
29 janv. 2017, 16 h 51

Hi CdnAtHeart,
You will be getting ready to travel - or perhaps have already arrived in Canada.

Life, particularly when it involves other people, is so often out of our control. I wonder if knowing that things may very well change completely when you are not there to give direction, might be helpful. Not such a surprise.  

I do hope though that you are able to be there and to leave with some sense of hope.

Take care
Katherine 


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