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Réponse de Carlyn
23 oct. 2015, 16 h 48

Hi Wits End,

This is excellent, that your family members and you have coordinated this.

I think it's safe to say you can let go a bit and give yourself some time to heal while your Aunt and Sister take on the appointments. Leave all that in their hands now. Please try to let guilt go.

You've done this for 9 years....you have nothing to feel guilty about. You came through in a huge way for your Mom and will continue to, picking her up on weekends. Your sister and Aunt are helping now and it's okay to trust them to take good care of your Mom during the appointments etc.

Give yourself the time and allowance to focus on yourself and take care of you.

((Hug))
Carlyn 
 
Réponse de Tian
23 oct. 2015, 17 h 43

Carlyn makes perfect sense to me.
 
Réponse de wits end
25 oct. 2015, 14 h 07

Yes it is time to take care of myself. I have let go of the guilt about now wanting to be there during the week. I really need the time to come and go whenever I decide or if I decide, or if I just want to be by meyself.  This has been a long journey in spite of all the problems. A respite is long overdue.
 
Réponse de NatR
25 oct. 2015, 15 h 38

Good Sunday morning everyone,

just wantEd to add  a comment about Guilt

There seems to be No Way to relieve the Guily we all feel!
one thing I can say this forum has helped me - is that we all feel the same weight and feelings of inadequacy - no matter how many hours we give care or support someone - we all want to do more Til it breaks us down

there is nothing to be gained by losing ourselves to guilt -  which will always tug at our elbows .
 We deserve rest and peace of mind 

that is the common theme here - rest, renew, pay attention to self 
glad you all post your inner most thoughts / you all help me too

hugs and best wishes
natr 
👍😃
  
 
Réponse de KathCull_admin
01 déc. 2015, 14 h 47

Good morning,
Wits end - did you get some time to look after yourself? It can take some time to get used to just 'being' and not 'doing'.  Were you able to rest?

Charlie1 started How do other people deal with caring for a loved one  earlier this year. 

Do you think your siblings have a different appreciation for all you do for your mother?

Take care
Katherine 
 
Réponse de wits end
02 déc. 2015, 0 h 15

Sorry I havne't been on in a while. Mom just finished up pallitive radiaton on a new mass behind her breast bone. My sister stepped up and looked after Mom during the week, while I had time to myself. I picked her up on weekends to bring her home. The radiation has taken it's toll on my and now she is very tired and coughing more than ever. Her weight has dropped below 100 lbs and i am worried she may not make it to the holidays. :(   She is weak and not really eating a lot. We are on a roller coaster now.

Thank you for thinking of me
 
Réponse de Carlyn
02 déc. 2015, 0 h 23

((Wits End)) 

I'm keeping you and your Mom and family in my thoughts. 

Carlyn 
 
Réponse de NatR
02 déc. 2015, 1 h 04

Dear Wits End,

sending my thoughts  your way - I can't imagine how you feel. Worrying day to day with the holidays around the corner.  Hoping that you will
feel the thoughts we send your way - and deal with one day at a time

very glad you were able to get a bit of rest  -but sometimes it just isn't enough / hang in there 
best wishes,
natR 
 
Réponse de KathCull_admin
06 avr. 2016, 16 h 37

Hello everyone,
Was just thinking about you wits end and wondering how you, your mom and family are doing. I hope there has been space for you to breath.

Katherine 


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