Hi Melinda,
I'm so glad that you had a good sleep. Sharing the load certainly does make a difference. My daughter told me last night that a friend of hers that she had worked with, just lost her dad. She reached out to her and let her know that she could call anytime she needed to talk. The girl remembered that my daughter has gone down this road and that she knows just how hard it is so I'm sure that they will keep in touch.
I'm not sure how things work where you are but here, once you're under the umbrella of palliative care, you are able to get beds, walkers, wheelchairs, shower seats etc. at no cost to you. We just had basic medical and everything was supplied to us. It made things so much easier. If you can't get in touch with the doctor you might want to ask the nurses that come in. They're quite knowledgeable about these things or can get the answers.
For your sake I hope that when Stan does go, that it's under the watchful eyes of a medical team. I think we all would like to go at home but it is one of the toughest things for the survivors. I don't know how many times I went back in while I waited for the undertaker to show up, to check and make sure that Len was really gone. We also had to wait until the office opened so it was about 6 hours before they showed up here and even then I had to ask if they could make sure that he really was gone. They looked a little surprised but since I had no medical training I didn't want to be mistaken. I guess more than anything else, I was in major shock.
I imagine that once Stan is in the care of the hospital that they will keep him somewhat sedated so the smoking and drinking will probably not be a huge issue. In his weakened state they will just keep him calm. When you said that he was freezing and vomiting, it made me wonder if he's bleeding internally. I know my dad had an issue with internal bleeding and it took until a week before he passed away, for them to discover he had a tumor wrapped around his heart which was causing all kinds of issues including feeling very cold.
I'm glad you are being proactive when it comes to that buddy of his. It's those type of people that know no boundaries and he probably would come back looking for at the least, a beer, when he knows that no one is home. It's horrible to have to worry about things like that at a time like this but there are always those low life types just waiting. I know it so well. I still have a neighbor (different guy) who always talks about what a great guy Len was and yet wants to buy things from me at an extremely discounted price. It used to make me so angry but now I just laugh at him and say 'Take it'. Less for me to have to get rid of. Some people have no morals.
Wow! You have a river in front of your house? That must be incredible in the summer months. We have a share in Len's family cabin on Vancouver Island and it is so tranquil to sit back and stare out at the lake. Last year we spent the one year anniversary date of his passing out there and I think it was one of the best things we could have done although his memory was there at every turn. My one brother in law wants me to sell out our share of the cabin but I don't want to take that away from my daughters. It's part of their dad and he wanted them to have it. Always someone wanting to take advantage of a bad situation.
I hope today is a calm one for you.
Hugs,
Tracie